SAME SHIT, DIFFERENT DAY

So my student M. How does one describe him? He’s like this mid-west cornfield surfer dude slash pot head, only far less cool. He’s got a voice like a lame animal. It’s pathetic and whiny and has no shape. When I hear it, I want to stab pencils into my brain. Am I making myself clear? He rarely comes to class and when he does, he’s never listening to my lecture. Instead he’s messing around with his idiot My Space account.

Anyway, today he came to class with a plate of hot food and after he finished eating, he had the audacity to ask me to hand him one of the napkins stacked near the dry erase board. I am right in the middle of a lecture about the geometry of circles, so I’m thinking, a) inappropriate, and b) rude, and c) hell no and a few other things I'm not even going to type. I am paid to teach math. I am not paid to hand whiny kids nappies so they can clean up their little messes. So I ignored him and he sulked.

Oh, hon. Didn’t get what you want?

I know life is so hard, right?

After the lecture he packed up his things and left. I decided to follow him out so we could have a little talk in the hall. I asked him what was up, and he told me that he thinks I’m uptight and cranky and that I don’t like to have any fun. Awesome. I was laughing at this point because it was so clear to me. He thinks I’m a total drag because I don’t brook his bullshit. He’s the only person getting a D+ in the class and he’s criticizing me for not making class fun.

Ach, kids.