OUT OF THE CAVE

Ladies and gentlemen, I just bought a cell phone. I was trying to get my birth control prescription filled last week (last minute thing) when I found myself hopelessly snared in the ropy mess of Planned Parenthood’s IVR, interactive voice response system. I wanted to talk to a live person, but all I got was Lady Robot telling me to press-one-to-reach-the-clinic-and-press-two-to-reach-the-administrative-office.

And all I could do was stare helplessly at my beautiful, army-green rotary phone wheel.