NOT "FUNNY HA-HA"

My first hour students were calmly debating the issue of oil exploration in ANWR this morning when a custodian came into the classroom and asked to see me in the hallway. He told me that a bomb threat had been made and I needed to get my students out of the building as soon as possible. Once outside, we were told that all classes were canceled for the day.

So it's a beautiful day and classes are canceled. I should be skipping with elation, right? Thing is, my keys, my phone, my wallet, my bicycle are all in my office and I'm not allowed to go in and retrieve them. Not until tomorrow, maybe. So I float around downtown with three collegues like vagabonds in search of a bar that's open. We find one and sit down only to be carded by some teeny bopper waitress in pancake make-up (you know that off color concealer that makes people's blemishes look even more flaky and crusty). I tell her, exasperated, about our crazy extenuating circumstances. She is completely unmoved.

What a pisser, eh?