SMALL TALK

While smoking cigarettes on the back porch today * I saw an American Crow reunion. I was witness to much cawing and ceremonial breaking of pine tree twigs. I think so many people regard their chitchat as noise, an unpleasant racket to be swept into a corner of our consciousness. But is it really any different from the inane, scripted dialogues I hear at my new workplace day in/out?

“Hello. How are you doing today?”
“Oh, I’m just fine. How are you?”
“I’m good. Is it cold outside today?”
“Yeah it’s a bit chilly, caw! Caw!”
“Caw, caw, caw! Caw, caw, caw!”
“Caw, caw, caw, caw!”
“Caw, caw, caw, caw!”

Whatever.

Oh people, relationships are hard! And I mean the whole fucking lot of them. They’re like crossword puzzles to me and all I can do is sit here and chew on my pen. And I’m sick of asking other people for clues. And what the hell am I doing with a pen anyway? I should be using a pencil and a big fat gum eraser. Oh, this metaphor tires me so.

* I’m currently training for my first international triathlon and I have been smoking a least one cigarette a day. Look at me. I’m a swiming, biking, running contradiction.