SCENES FROM THE LOO

I'm on holiday.
So stay tuned.

AVOCADOS FOR TEACHER

My student Z gave me two avocados on this day, the last day of class. Isn't that sweet? I told them that if they wanted to bribe me, avocados and beer would speak louder than apples. Ha ha! I'm going to go home now to eat dinner and grade finals. I hope I don't smear guacamole on them.

MY GUACAMOLE RECIPE:

1. Mash two ripe avocados
2. Lick the buttery fruit from the spoon
3. Add a few cloves minced garlic
4. Add a tablespoon of minced red onion
5. Add a tablespoon of chopped cilantro
6. Suppress orgasmic fits of excitement
7. Add the juice from a wedge of lime
8. Add salt and pepper to taste
9. Salivate like Ivan Pavlov's bitch
10. Eat!

MEDIUM HARD

"If you ever get the impression that I have it all together...you can punch me medium-hard."

NOT QUICK ENOUGH

The quarter is quickly drawing to a close, but not quick enough. I'm very fondly remembering now, ten weeks back when my student M raised her pink nail polished hand to tell me that she was watching the news last week and heard that evolution-as in the theory of-had been disproved.

I asked her what channel that was on, cause obviously, I missed that breaking news flash.