TOO MUCH INFORMATION

If a student has a legitimate excuse for missing class, it is my policy to give that person an excused absence. I'm pretty reasonable. I know how people get sick or have to deal with family emergencies. I think it is only fair to cut slack when slack cutting is required.

One student, M, missed class yesterday. He told me he has a lot of stuff going on in his life right now. (OK, fine.) And then he goes on to tell me how he got two women pregnant and how he is trying to keep them from getting abortions and one of them is pissed at him and turned his phone off and that's why he slept in yesterday and missed class.

The whole time he spoke, I was trying to stanch his words. I shook my head and made quick cutting motions with my hands. Finally, I told him to stop talking. Please just stop talking! But what kills me is how he kept shrugging his shoulders, insisting he is super responsible, insisting that others keep trying to sabotage his good intentions. People just keep 'messing' with him. People like the baby-mama that turned off his phone.

I so badly wanted to point out the obvious: That if he were responsible, why did he get two women pregnant? But I didn't want to sound like that Jerry Springer audience member. You know, the one in the back row that's tossing a pointed finger around, saying things like, "Hey Jerry! Uh yah uuh! I just wanna say, I don't remember your name, but you, yeah you with the red sweater, that shits fucked up dude! You can't just keep havin babies with all kinds of women! Uuh that's messed up!"

*sigh*

I don't want to be that person.