TV ON THE RADIO

"one two three, four five six, seven eight nine, ten eleven twelve ladybugs caaaaaaaame, to the ladybugs' picnic!" Gawd. I'm such a child of public television. My parents are total socialists, so they wouldn't let me and my brother Pit Pat watch commercial TV when we were growing up. No TV and no sugar cereals! Because we said so! Now go and play with your Marx and Engel dolls, comrade!

Only kidding.

But not really. In any case, the fact that I was raised on instructional television and Cracklin' Oat Bran has influenced my adult life. Some people I know find TV comforting. They likes to have it on at all hours of the day. Is it like having a friend in the living room talking to himself all day? Some folks I know can multitasking with the television on; they can carry on a conversation, they can cook a meal, they can even read with it on. I could never do that. Once the screen lights up with photons, my jaw goes slack and my eyes turn into swirling pinwheels. I have a television now after being without one for almost two years. So if you don't hear from me in a few months...